New look! I hated that green, that's all. Green fucking sucks.
Every Wednesday the One Minute Angels visit 3D World and give us all massages. At first I just felt plain guilty, like I was being serviced by a hooker, only a not very good one. Anyway I've stopped trying to make conversation with them. There's a different one every week, what's the point? It's like making small talk with taxi drivers. Why bother. If they were interesting people they wouldn't be taxi drivers, right? Sorry to any taxi drivers reading this.
Anyway, I keep forgetting to respond to my blog comments, so here's a wrap-up:
Astrid: I'm off to the States at the end of June. Plenty of time for a nice dinner, if you're still keen... ha.
Dan: Made out with any married women lately? High-five!
Jackie: Thanks for all that. Those tours -- we've checked them out now -- sound marvellous. This is all starting to feel like it's actually going to happen. The sort of feeling you get when you, like, see the Pirates of the Caribbean 3: At World's End trailer for the first time. A good feeling.
Pat A: Thanks for the big ups. How does one spell 'big ups' anyway? With a hyphen? One word? Who cares? That Dan Brown story was what those in the know call a 'surprise success'. Almost as popular as the Vertigo piece where I got beaten up by seven-year-olds.
Unbiased Critic: I'll be slowly implementing your suggestions. As you can see I've changed the blog title, which I think is a vast improvement. Thanks for dropping on by. You should write for my magazine. Or do you already? Hmm.
About Me
Another blog?
Fellows and Fillies
- banal as anything
- Bastards everywhere!
- Captain Career & Jemima Jobbs
- A Dying Star
- The Dissident
- I [Heart] Inkpen
- i wish you could talk
- It's OK to show bum crack
- je suis ici
- legal will
- My Mother Was A DJ
- Rhiannon's Frequently Renamed Blog
- Spleen Central
- Sydney is not Tokyo
- Things I've yet to do with your mother
- This is Lenman
- This is today
- Where mice gather to head-bang to a minuet of hemi-demi-semi quavers in the key of F minor
7 comments:
Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait!
Daniel never mentioned anything about a married woman... he mentioned something about an older port drinking woman.
Same chick?
errr different chick, and i did mention it in passing and it was only once, and she took advantage of me being a naive youth or sumfing.
Bahaaa ha ha you got taken advantage of by and older chick. Only some big four eyed lame-o would do that...
... wait.
by the way when I said 'by and' I meant 'by an', obviously....
Zepplin Rule.
Yes I dare say that is quite the improvement.
You also rid yourself of that 'Kermit the Frog' shade of green. There's a homosexual children's entertainer if ever I saw one.
The site could still use a lot of work though, and furthermore it appears to be getting worse. Anyone who posts ANYTHING to do with Shakespeare on their personal blog is just screaming ‘I’m a pseudo intellectual, respect my post-modern quirkiness!’. Here’s a tip for you jackass; lying in the bath reading Hamlet while cutting yourself doesn’t make you intelligent, you’re just likely to get blood on a perfectly good book.
And your criticism of massage therapists is completely unfounded. Your company does something nice for you and you manage to turn it into something negative. I will now be calling up this particular company and informing them of this post. If you receive an ‘accidental’ Vulcan Death Grip during next week’s massage, don’t be surprised. Also I think your attack on the quality of their hookers is a little unfounded. With a name like ‘One Minute Angels’ it sounds like their hooker-skills are anything but poor.
In answer to your question, I don’t currently write for your mag. According to recent studies, in the grand order of things, this is roughly how dance music stacks up:
-The Coolest Thing Ever-
-World War Z (The oncoming zombie invasion which results in an apocalyptic battle between the zombie hoards and a new breed of modern ninja)-
-Lesbian Vampires-
-Regular Lesbians-
-Slightly Unnattractive Lesbians-
-The Chaser-
-Pancakes-
-Brussel Sprouts-
-Lesbian Cockroaches-
-Regular Cockroaches-
-Mould-
-Worst Thing Ever-
-Dance Music-
As you can see, scientifically speaking, dance music is roughly slightly worse than mould. Thus, by association 3DWorld and all of its employees are also worse than mould. What can I say? You can’t argue with science.
I must also admit a certain amusement at reading some of your friend’s responses. For someone posting Shakespeare related content on his site I expected at least some quasi-articulate responses from friends, but instead I’m greeted with words like ‘sumfing’. Yea dropping those two letters must have really saved you some time moron. Oh and I forgot how much cooler Internet slang makes you look. ROFLWWIWD (Rolling On The Floor Laughing While Wishing I Was Dead).
Wow, that acronym was rather emo of me. I need to wrap things up and get off this site before the vibe rubs off on me too much. I think my hair has started getting darker.
In conclusion I have seen some improvements, but you still have a long way to go. You could start by simply not insulting random minorities when you don’t know the demographic of your readership. You never know who you might send into a homicidal killing spree..
-Unbiased Critic (The Taxi Driver)
You do realize we do that to make fun of people who talk like that right?
It's okay to post comments but please don't post threats.
If you're taking anything I say seriously, you clearly don't know me very well =)
(Yes I am aware of the irony of that statement in the context of my moniker)
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